One afternoon, my daughter was building with blocks.

She stopped and said,
“Dad would probably be better at this.”

It was a small comment.
Maybe she didn’t mean much by it.

But research from the University of Washington suggests that by age six, many children already begin to believe that computer science and engineering are “for boys.”

Six years old.

Still learning to tie shoes.
Still learning to read.

And yet, ideas about who belongs in certain spaces may already be forming.

When we tell our daughters,
“You’re so pretty” or “You’re adorable,”
there’s nothing wrong with that.

But when those are the words they hear most often,
they may start to think they're valued for how they look.

What if we added different words?

Confidence doesn’t grow from getting it right.

It grows from trying again.

You don’t need a coding class.
You don’t need special kits.

You just need space to explore.

Give your child spaghetti and marshmallows.

Ask them to build the tallest tower they can.

When it falls, say, “Good. Now we know something.”

The rule is simple:
Falling is part of the plan.

With ice, salt, and milk, you can make homemade ice cream.

Ask questions:

Why does it get colder?
Why does it turn solid?

Focus on curiosity, not perfection.

Use a flashlight and paper cutouts.

Move them closer and farther from the wall.

Why does the shadow grow?
Why does it shrink?

It feels like play.

But inside their minds, they are learning how to observe, test, and adjust.

That’s engineering.

We often ask,
“Is my child good at science?”

A better question might be:

“Does my child feel safe to fail here?”

Engineering thinking isn’t about never being wrong.

It’s about trying again.

And that has nothing to do with gender.

This week, try something small:

You don’t need to raise a genius.

You just need to keep the door open.

That’s enough.

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